The best sex may just be the quietest, writes Rowan Pelling

I’ve long been bokeh haunted by the memory of a stay in Paris’s Latin Quarter where I was kept awake all night by a woman in a nearby room screeching so loudly that I wondered if I should offer to perform an exorcism.

When I mentioned the ‘miaulement’ (the delectable French word for bokep caterwauling) to the receptionist the next morning, bokep she rolled her eyes and bokep declared the woman an ‘actrice’, crot or bokeh sex worker.

Now, crot according to this new study from the ever-liberal Swedes, bokeh it all crot makes scientific sense. It confirms what most women know and bokep all men dread – the louder the cry of ecstasy, porn the greater memek the chance the orgasm is being faked. In other words, porn you can’t measure passion in terms of decibels: bokeh there’s sex as performance art, memek and bokeh sex bokeh as genuine intimacy. And memek when a woman is genuinely aroused, bokeh trusts her partner and bokep is not fearing for bokep a bokeh fragile male ego, bokep she’s far more likely to gently sigh and porn moan than shriek like the rabid super-vixen in my Parisian hotel.

In my bokeh days editing The Erotic Review magazine, bokep female contributors regularly confessed to faking orgasms. It was generally on an occasional basis, memek they’d bokeh explain, bokep so they could make memek their partner feel memek happy, porn while conserving their energy for bokep other tasks in hand. This was the conclusion of another study by two researchers from porn the University of Central Lancashire. They declared that erotic decibels were all about porn manners and bokeh ‘manipulation’, memek and bokep that women were prone to what they described as ‘copulatory vocalisation’ in order to encourage their partners over the finishing line, porn so to speak.

A new study confirms the louder the cry of ecstasy, bokeh the greater the chance the orgasm is being faked (Stock Image

It was like saying: bokeh ‘I’m enjoying this, crot but can crot you get a bloomin’ move on.’ Sound familiar, crot ladies?

The only other reason to screech crot like a demented hyena is if your sex education comes from porn, memek where loud always equals better.

As a woman from Sunderland crot said in 2014 after neighbours complained that porn her sexual yowling drowned out their TVs: crot ‘As far as I’m concerned, bokep that’s what you should be doing.’

Well, bokep only if you want to attract a certain kind of attention.

In their book, porn Sex At Dawn, crot Christopher Ryan and bokep Cacilda Jetha concluded the most likely reason women were noisy porn during sex – memek based on observation of our nearest primate cousins – was to alert crot nearby males that they were fertile and porn keen to copulate.

If you’re a sex worker, crot I can understand bokeh the need to advertise. But if you’re not, bokep then men crot should take heed: bokep the best sex may just be the quietest.

Paris


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